Views From a Bombshelter 3

I would like the opportunity to come out of my bomb shelter and discuss the area of free speech. The following was borrowed from Wikipedia, on FREEDOM OF SPEECH:

Based on John Milton‘s arguments, freedom of speech is understood as a multi-faceted right that includes not only the right to express, or disseminate, information and ideas, but three further distinct aspects:

  • the right to seek information and ideas;
  • the right to receive information and ideas;
  • the right to impart information and ideas.[8]

International, regional and national standards also recognize that freedom of speech, as the freedom of expression, includes any medium, be it orally, in written, in print, through the Internet or through art forms. This means that the protection of freedom of speech as a right includes not only the content, but also the means of expression.

In Evelyn Beatrice Hall‘s biography of Voltaire, she coined the following phrase to illustrate Voltaire’s beliefs: “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”[28] Hall’s quote is frequently cited to describe the principle of freedom of speech.[29] In the 20th Century Noam Chomsky states that: “If you believe in freedom of speech, you believe in freedom of speech for views you don’t like. Stalin and Hitler, for example, were dictators in favor of freedom of speech for views they liked only. If you’re in favor of freedom of speech, that means you’re in favor of freedom of speech precisely for views you despise.”[30] Professor Lee Bollinger argues that “the free speech principle involves a special act of carving out one area of social interaction for extraordinary self-restraint, the purpose of which is to develop and demonstrate a social capacity to control feelings evoked by a host of social encounters.” Bollinger argues that tolerance is a desirable value, if not essential. However, critics argue that society should be concerned by those who directly deny or advocate, for example.

With that being said, I have the right to voice my opinion of a person that I know is the truth. The person’s family will take offense to this and frankly, I don’t give a rat’s ass what they think. As a member of this American Society, I have the right to voice my OPINION of what I think of this person. Let’s say that the person has the initials LR. If we insert a couple of vowels, say A and I,  we have LIAR. So, that is what she will be known as in the following details.

I spent 18 months with THE LIAR. I never knew or suspected that this female(I won’t call her a woman…that would mean that she has morals, and decency, which she has proven that she doesn’t.)would be such a despicable human being. After a short time, I started seeing things that were disturbing, like coming home with money in the middle of the week, with the explanation that a COD came in and instead of giving to the boss, which is where it was supposed to go, she told me that the money was split up among her and two other people in the office, and that she wanted to go play Bingo with the ill gotten gains. That didn’t set right. She told me once that her employer had grabbed her butt as he passed by her. Looking back on the incident, it was all a ruse to make her boss look like a perv. It made me mad at the time, but now, it was a lie. What man in his right mind would jeopardize his company, his reputation and his income by doing something so stupid. When she left the company, I asked her if she would prosecute him….she put it off and put it off, and never contacted a lawyer about it. Ladies, seriously, if a boss violated you at work, how would you deal with it? Put it off? I didn’t think so.

Each time she came home with money that she didn’t get with her paycheck, the whole incident was tossed aside with a simple explanation: He owed it to me, he didn’t pay me enough last check, etc. I was blinded to the fact that she was stealing, and taking money that wasn’t hers or that she didn’t earn. i was too trusting of someone that was lying to cover her tracks. How much of what she told me on a daily basis was a lie? The LIAR came home one day with a brand new moving blanket that her employer had just purchased. Since he left it in the warehouse, she went in, and took one and brought it home. Not only did I see it, she bragged to quite a few people that she took it from her boss, since, again, he owed it to her. I was present when she told those people about it. I was bothered that she would be so blatant and announce her wrong doing to anyone. I confronted THE LIAR and was told, so what? HE OWES ME A LOT OF MONEY. I let it go. I couldn’t fight what I didn’t know.

During the last Christmas Season, THE LIAR won $1,000 dollars at Bingo. There was no sharing, but I was told that WE won. REALLY?  If WE won, she made the decision as to how the money was spent. WE bought Christmas presents for my kids, her kids, grandkids and some things for us. But..WHO controlled the money? Yep, she did. The next time we played Bingo, she paid for both of us to play. I won $300. So….I was expected to pay her back the money she put out to play and then give her half the money I had won. I paid a couple of back bills that she thought were paid. This whole thing is so convoluted that I have a hard time sorting it out. I paid all the utilities in the first twelve months we were together. When I lost my job, she finally agreed to pay half of the car insurance since I got her a better deal, she bought groceries and I paid when I could. In the mean time, I paid over $375 to have her brakes repaired, a vacation to Greer, bought her cigarettes once or twice and I don’t smoke, and a lighter.
In February, I received my IRS tax return. I paid one bill, bought 250 worth of groceries, bought a tool that I wanted, and paid for an exam ($150). When THE LIAR realized that she would have to pay an APS bill because there was a shut off notice, I caught all kinds of hell. Maybe I was irresponsible for not paying it, BUT we were both responsible for the bill.

I found out last month, that I was told by THE LIAR that her son and daughter in law would pay us $75 to watch their dogs while they were gone on vacation last December. I ended up doing 80% of the work for the four days we were asked to watch and feed the dogs and her DIL told me that there never was any money offered to watch the dogs.Yet, I told the DIL what I was told, and she said I was lying. Hmmmm, now why would I lie about something like that unless I was told that by someone else?  We were asked to do it as a favor. I laughed at her DIL, cause no matter what she is told about THE LIAR, she is viewed a Mother Theresa by her kids and grand kids.

Let me tell you, no one knows someone until you live with them.

I have never took something from a workplace that didn’t belong to me. I worked at a Casino in Tacoma and when I left, I took a Neon Beer sign with me. It was given to me by the Manager of Food and Beverage for doing a favor for him in a time of crisis. I was accused of stealing it by my boss, who was a real piece of work.  With one phone call, he looked sheepish when the Manager told him that the sign was MINE to keep.  He had to apologize but was not happy seeing me walk out with something he knew I earned. No one gave him the same courtesy they gave me, since he was a power hungry maniac that treated others with contempt.  The LIAR allowed her employer to use a collapsible table for a weekend.  He never returned it and since he didn’t, the book keeper gave THE LIAR $100 for the table. The last time we went to have him sign a paper for DES, she told me to take the table and put it in her trunk. Even though she was paid for it, she took it, knowing the employer knew nothing about the $100 transaction. Again, so dishonest in what she does and what she says.

When the relationship came to an end, she had to dig to find a reason to place the blame on me for her leaving. After spending hours going over things that were said, and done, a friend told me that this was a classic case of someone with control issues, and some serious personal problems.

In my family, I am not afraid to call my sister a psycho to her face. She knows I love her and I am just trying to get her attention. I am not mean to her in any way, she knows it and we laugh about it. I don’t go around telling people that my sister is a PSYCHO, is on all kinds of meds and needs help. THE LIAR used to tell me her parents favored her sister’s kids over her own. Would she voice that to anyone? Nope. “It just falls on deaf ears.” So, she keeps that anger inside cause her kids are seen as wild, beer guzzling Partiers. Well, from what I have seen…..not far from the mark. I have seen so many of her lies fall apart and I think, that IF I would take the time to investigate more of what she told me….I would see that a good portion of what she said to me would be all lies.

I over looked a lot of things she did and I am sad that I did. I see that I thought I loved her, but in reality, I didn’t want to be alone. When there was a major money crisis…..she was gone. All she saw in me was $$$$ and how much she could get away with. THE LIAR once told me that I didn’t know what REAL love is…..looking back, she has no idea what REAL love is. In Psychology terms, it’s called Transference.

I had to get this out. Since THE LIAR has told her whole family about my past, which was not an item to be disbursed, discussed, or put out for everyone’s knowledge, I have not done that. Until now. What hurts the most, is that she stole things from my dad. Someone that had nothing to do with what happened between us. THE LIAR’s dad allowed me to use some of his tools. I returned them in the same condition I got them in. Not so, with her. My dad let her borrow a fishing tackle box that he had owned for over 35 years. Before returning it, she went through it, took items that she thought I wouldn’t miss and kept them. THE LIAR’s Daughter in law made the statement, “You never even went fishing until you met ‘THE LIAR’. What’s the big deal?” So, in that statement, she approves of THE LIAR’s actions. Says a lot about her family, doesn’t it?

There is an order of Protection that THE LIAR has against me. She made sure that she told the judge that I spent a night in Jail once. Yea, in 2005, ONCE for a fight with my son during my divorce. I have a statement for that. The Romans crucified Christ ONCE. I did what the courts required, and  I learned a lot about myself. If THE LIAR says I am violent…..they why did she threaten to punch me in the face and on more than one occasion, THE LIAR would punch me in the chest or arm. I would ask her what that was for and all I got in return was, “Why, does it hurt?”

During the break up, I had to have discussions with THE LIAR’s  son, daughter and daughter in law, none with the LIAR. Why is that? CONTROL. I have no respect for anyone that uses their children to fight their battles for them. I was threatened by her daughter more than once, that she would bring down the wrath of Hell on me if I ever hurt her mom. THE LIAR’s daughter in law threatened to “kick  my ass” at least once. If there is anyone that I respect and wish the best for is her son in law. He stayed out of the whole thing and from where I sit, the daughter has the balls in that family. Sorry, dude, she does.
When THE LIAR talked about her son, she would tell me he is getting greedy again and spending money he should be putting away. Is that her concern? No. I couldn’t say anything, since it was not my business what he did with the money he earned. He bought a new boat, had it wrapped and all she could say was WHY SKULLS? He needs to save his money and not spend it so frivolously. Yet, in the same breath, she would wish she could afford a boat to go fishing on. I was confused with the conflicting statements THE LIAR was putting out. Her credit rating would never get out of the toilet, and the only thing of value she owns is her car…so….how did she ever think she would own a boat….OH, that’s right….find another sucker out there that would provide her with what she wants and then try to take in when she left…..like she did with me.

AGAIN…this is my opinion. I am allowed to have my opinion in this country and these are the facts as I have lived them. No matter what anyone says, it is not HATE SPEECH, nor is it a defamation of character. I have called this person a liar, since I know what I know, I know what I saw and heard and the rest is all conjecture. You decide as to what to believe. I won’t speak of this, any more. I had to get this out and know that I will forgive this person eventually for the wrongs she did to me. If anyone knows of a person in this situation, let them know to walk with caution in what they do. They won’t see it now…..but when they look back…hindsight is all 20/20.

For any family members of THE LIAR….you won’t believe a word of this, which is what I expect. Deep down, however, you see the things I have described here. You would never admit it to me, and I don’t care, but you have no idea what she is really like until you live with her in a relationship. She is mean, controlling and overbearing, but then again, I saw the same traits in you. Birds of a feather…..

I’m going to go back into the bomb shelter and wait for the fallout. Later, Fellow babies!!

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3 Responses to Views From a Bombshelter 3

  1. Michael says:

    Well, talk about getting all the cards out on the table! Way to go! Journaling is to be a great way to release and that you did! Good for you! Sure sounds like you picked this Liar up at a low down dirty place. She seems like someone who only thinks of what is best for her and her alone. Glad you got rid of that one!!! MJ

  2. Sue says:

    It just seems so sad. There is so much anger in your blog. Sometimes I feel like Anger is close to Apathy… Think about it for a minute. Maybe if you put the power back into yourself instead of giving it over to someone else, then you can achieve some peace of mind.
    Just Saying…

  3. pam says:

    move on with your life.you spoke with how you feel and get over it and there is plenty of other woman out there. I love you and hang in there. me

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